did i love well?

by Alexandra Smith

“When I imagine myself as an old woman at the end of my life & ask myself how I will evaluate my time here, there is only one question: Did I love well? There are a thousand ways to love another & the world- with our touch, our words, our silences, our work, our presence. I want to love well. This is my hunger. I want to make love to the world by the way I live in it, by the way I am with myself & others every day. So I seek to increase my ability to be with the truth in each moment, to be with what I know, the sweet & the sorrowful… . .And sometimes, I allow myself to imagine that each moment in which we love well by simply being all of who we are & being fully present allows us to give back something essential to the Sacred Mystery that sustains all life.” ~ Oriah Mountain Dreamer

by Alexandra Smith

“Beginnings often frighten us because they seem like lonely voyages into the unknown. Yet, in truth, no beginning is empty or isolated. We seem to think that beginning is setting out from a lonely point along some line of direction into the unknown. This is not the case. Shelter and energy come alive when a beginning is embraced. A beginning is ultimately an invitation to open toward the gifts and growth that are stored up for us. To refuse to begin can be an act of great self-neglect.”
— John O'Donohue

by Alexandra Smith

“Take two small pieces of paper. On one,
write: the world was created for me. On
the other: I am only dust and ashes. Put
one in each pocket. Never leave the house
without them.”
— Alicia Jo Rabins, “How to Assess Your Net Worth,” from The American Poetry Review (vol. 40, no. 2, March/April 2011)

by Alexandra Smith

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as if everything is.”
— Albert Einstein

oh hi 28!

by Alexandra Smith

yesterday was my birthday and i have to say, i’m pretty damn excited for 28. my life tends to move at high speed, and in general i’m down for most anything that comes. i’m always half rooted, half wanderlusting around the west and the globe. my last year has been an intense one.. and while i could go on and on about what went down while i was traveling at the speed of light, the easiest way to sum it up is that i shed a lot of things (attachments to a mainstream career, relationship, expectations, plans) to kiss way more closely the parts of me that make my heart beat, my lungs breathe, and my life spark.

i feel like i’m stepping into this next trip around the sun much, much closer and in love with who i am and where i want to go. teaching in the jail, doing healing work, giving myself more time to create and play music. i’m also way more comfortable than i ever have been letting go of the life i planned to let the one i’m meant to have arrive. i can’t wait to see what surprises roll in this year.

my friend merete, who writes words like magic, wished me a year “like a million little fireflies on a warm night hidden in the trees in the middle of a buzzing metropolis.” such a perfect mantra for my new year. to spark light, and hang onto it even in the hidden cracks of life that are hanging onto evening air.

life, thanks for rockin’ it. here’s to 28.

by Alexandra Smith

so. much. to update on here. it has been a month full of adventure, heart cracks getting wider, tons of good surprises. for now, though, i’m hunkered down in vermont for my twin sister’s magical wedding. until i have a few to sit down and report on life, here’s a new mary oliver poem i’m really loving:

song of the builders

On a summer morning

I sat down
on a hillside
to think about God -

a worthy pastime.
Near me, I saw
a single cricket;
it was moving the grains of the hillside

this way and that way.
How great was its energy,
how humble its effort.
Let us hope

it will always be like this,
each of us going on
in our inexplicable ways
building the universe.

daily soul →

by Alexandra Smith

my bright as the sun pal mb kicked off an instagram challenge this month along with two of her LA friends. the idea is to tag a slice of soul in your life every day for the month of june. i’ve been loving it. while i do take time to write a gratitude list every morning, something feels different about intentionally looking around the texture, colors, and experiences of your day to capture the pieces that make your spirit spark. the practice has helped me stay more present in my day, search out the good no matter what, and feel a whole lot of holy gratitude.click the linked title above to check out my daily soul so far.